Worry or Trust – which will I choose?

Fear, worry, anxiety – these are common feeding grounds for many of us. This is where we spend much of our time and much of our mental capacities. But as a follower of Christ, we know that we should be different. If you have followed Jesus for any length of time, I am sure you have heard something to the effect, “don’t worry, you just need to trust God”. But, in my experience, that “just” is far easier to say than to do.

The Bible is full of verses about fear, anxiety and worry. From the book of Genesis to the book of Revelation, we hear the call to not be afraid. This is both comforting and confronting. We can find solace in the fact that worry, fear and anxiety are not new to us, not problems rooted in our day. Instead, they are as old as time itself, or at least as old as the first humans that walked on this planet. It seems that human beings have always walked in fear. But, the resounding cry of the Bible is that the people of God are to be different. That we are a people set apart and marked by peace and trust.

These words are easy to say, but the practice, that is so difficult. For how do we learn to trust God? What does it mean to do so? And what does it mean that God is trustworthy?

Let’s focus on the last of those questions first. To begin answering it, I feel that one must specify some things it does not mean. As followers of Jesus, we are not shielded from pain or suffering, in fact, it seems the opposite is true.

We are called to walk the path that Jesus walked, and that means walking the path of suffering. (I am acutely aware that suffering is a vast topic that cannot be covered in this current post, please forgive me for only giving it a passing glance, I hope in the future to discuss this in greater depth). God does not promise that bad things will not happen to us, and that cannot be where our faith rests. For if it does then, sometime, probably in the not-to-distant-future our faith will crumble and fall, and we will find ourselves kneeling in the dust, and wondering where our God has gone.

So if we are not immune to suffering, what does it mean that God is trustworthy? If we look at the verses about worry, fear and anxiety, they have something in common: the reason they give, time and time again, is that we should not be afraid because God is with us. For the Israelites who had left Egypt that meant he was physically with them in a cloud and pillar of fire, then he was with them in the tabernacle and the temple. But from the time of Jesus, this presence has taken a different form. No longer is the presence of God to be found in some external place, from which we can come and go, instead, profoundly, God’s presence is in the people of God themselves. We have each become a temple of the living God as he has come and dwelt within us.

You and I are temples of the living God. God has come and made his home in us. We are never abandoned, never forsaken, he is always with us.

The words God spoke to Joshua, he speaks over each of us,

“Do not be frightened or dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

Joshua 1:9

I am not writing this as someone looking from the outside seeing the struggles of others and wondering why they can’t seem to get it all together. No, I am writing this as someone who has struggled throughout my life with worry and fear. I naturally worry. These feelings come so quickly to me. I have strong memories of being afraid even as a child, often of what to others would seem absurd, but it was no less real to me.

My husband often tells me just how ridiculous it is that my mind often wanders through all possible scenarios, just in case they could happen. But, I think, don’t I need a contingency plan for all eventualities? And if I haven’t thought them through then who knows what could happen? As if the planning somehow protects me, when in truth, I am dwelling in insecurity and pouring my energies into obscure possibilities, most of which will never come to pass.

While I still do this often, things have changed in me over time. I have discovered time and time again that God is incredibly trustworthy. I have seen how he has provided over and over for my family and for our needs. He has gone ahead of us even in the most heartbreaking situations and shown me, and us, his love and his presence. I have learnt that I am not alone. That he is always with me. And I am learning to trust him more and more.

That is not to say I am at the point where I do not worry, that I am never afraid. I am a work in progress. And I am abundantly grateful that that is all that the Lord is asking me to be. In fact, even in the writing of this, the Lord has confronted me with another way that I fail to trust him, subtle though it seemed. And I am seeking to address this.

It seems to me that the enemy does his best to distract us from the reality of our life in Christ, and we so easily fall into his hands. We become like Martha, “worried and distracted by many things” and we forget that “only one thing is needed” (Luke 10:42).

Nothing renders the people of God so helpless as pulling us away from the reality of the presence of God. From moving us from sitting at his feet. From letting us think we are other than we are – the people of God, indwelt by the Holy Spirit, the Spirit of the Father and the Son, the dwelling place of God himself.

Sometimes I think, and I suspect this is true for others also, that I don’t have a choice. But this is another subtle deception. I always have a choice. I can choose which voices I will listen to. And I can decide where I position myself. Will I be Mary or Martha today?

Lord, help me, help us, to choose to be Mary every time! Amen

So how about you? Do you relate? How have you learnt to trust God?

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