I’m not really a fan of small talk. I know my personality type has a lot to answer for here, but as an INFJ, I would rather just skip the small talk, and talk instead about what really matters. Don’t get me wrong, I can talk about the weather just like anyone who has lived for any length of time in this southern city at the bottom of the world. I know that social norms dictate small talk as a safe and comfortable place to converse, I get that many would much rather stay there than delve into meaning and depth of connection.
But if I had a choice, and if I thought anyone would respond with even a little enthusiasm, this would be the question I would ask: Tell me about Jesus, please? Not just about what you know of him or what you have read about him, but tell me about him. What does he say to you, and how does he say it? What does he look like? Can you describe him for me? How have you found him?
Perhaps, you know nothing of this Jesus and these questions strike you as being profoundly odd, if so please continue reading, I hope what follows brings you a little clarity, perhaps you might also like to read this.
It strikes me that if I am to have the audacity to ask such a question, and to this point, I have usually lacked the nerve, then I must also have the courage to answer it.
I guess answering it is difficult because it goes to the most treasured and precious moments of my life. These encounters with Jesus I cherish and I seek to steward. I dwell on them, and they form me, I hope, into someone who is more like him.
So let me tell you about my Jesus. There is much I could say, truthfully I could talk for a very long time telling you of all he has done, all he has said, what I have found, and know, and what I still struggle to believe even though he gently, kindly and lovingly tells me over and over again.
But for now, I will tell you this.
I had a profound encounter with Jesus about 8 years ago in a vision.
In this vision, I was a child cowering in the corner of a dark and dirty, hovel of a room. Jesus came and looked in at the door and called to me. “Come”, he said. And I got up, covered in dirt and grime, dressed in rags, and I followed him. We walked through a place paved with ancient stones, our footsteps ringing until he brought me to a pool. There Jesus told me to wash. To my confusion, it was filled with what looked like blood, but I did as I was told. As I washed in that pool of blood, the unthinkable happened. All the dirt and grime simply washed away, and I was clean.
As I stepped from the pool , I discovered I was no longer clothed in rags, nor was I a child any longer. Instead, I was a woman dressed in a breathtakingly beautiful dress of white. Jesus was standing in front of me, I fell at his feet, bowing before him. All I could say was, “I am not worthy of your favour”. And my Jesus, he laughed the most wonderfully joy-filled laugh. And he said to me, “but you have it”.
Those four words utterly changed me.
This is my Jesus. He has washed me in his blood, died for me so that I can know him. He is more precious to me than anything else. And he surprises me again and again by his love, for he seems to value me more than I can comprehend, so much that I struggle to believe it. Jesus is so patient, so kind, so gentle. He has shown himself to be my friend, my confidant, my lover, always calling and drawing me to himself. He does not tire of me. Indeed he reassures me again and again of how he sees me and what he thinks of me. He knows my struggles, weaknesses and failings, and he loves me in them, not even despite them. He has promised to never leave me, nor forsake me. I know that I am safe in his hands.
Jesus calls me to adventure and to life. He is endlessly creative, and so much fun, he is clothed in joy and delight. He laughs, a lot.
My Jesus asks me to do things that I think are impossible. But when I have done the thing I thought I could never do I find myself caught in his loving arms and I hear him whisper “well done, daughter”. I know that he is absolutely trustworthy. Totally faithful. There is no end to my Jesus, only more to discover, more to find, and more to marvel at.
This is my Jesus.
That, at least for now, is my attempt to answer this question.
Jesus, my Jesus. You are my creator, my saviour, and my friend. I love you and I long to know you more, each and every day. May you reveal yourself to each of us today. Teach us about you. May we see your face. Amen
So would you tell me about Jesus, please, if you dare?
Maybe you have read this, and you are a follower of Jesus, but your personal experience of him is limited. Perhaps you feel frustrated, desperate, and you long to know him like this. I too have walked that journey, I wrote a bit about that here. What I know is that Jesus is calling you and drawing you to himself. That he has made you to know him and to be known by him. I would love to chat with you about this, feel free to send me a message.
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Really well written. It’s encouraging but also a good challenge to spend time getting to know Jesus better.
Beautiful. I’m an INFP so I relate to the small talk thing! And relate to a burning longing to always know Jesus deeper. What a wonderful vision He gave you. I too have had similar experiences that make me fall in love with Him over and over.
Hi Sal, so lovely to hear from you 🙂 And to share so many Myers-Briggs letters and this longing for Jesus in common. He is utterly amazing!