Gifts in the grey strands

This year, after a 25 year habit of covering my greys, I stopped dying my hair. Now mostly white and silver hair grows from my head, rather than the dark brown I was born with.

My first grey hairs sprouted when I was about 13 years old. The grey hairs seemed one more indication to my young teenage self that I was faulty. Whether from bad genes or poor stress management, I was broken (oh the things I now wish I could tell that girl-self!). Not long after, I began to cover the greys with hair dye. I was happy to do it for a long time, and kept up the pretence of all-brown hair.

My grey hair may seem a strange topic for a blog about drawing close to God. However, when you realise that God is an alive and diligent participant in all of life, it may not be such a surprise.

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Longing for God and the Gift of the Desert

For many years I longed for God. I wanted to know him, to see him, for a depth of relationship that was neither superficial nor non-existent. But while this was the longing and cry of my heart, my experience was far different. Despite my efforts, God seemed remote. I would read my Bible, I would pray, but the times that God appeared to draw near were rare. For me, this was my reality for more than fifteen years.

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